True Conflict Resolution Theory

In the 1950’s, one man, named Erik Erickson, theorized that humans go through eight stages of development that will determine their identities. In each stage, a person faces what he called a “crisis” that must be resolved, or else problems will occur later in life.

1. Trust versus Mistrust (experienced in infancy): An infant must find whether he or she can trust his or her mother and environment. If the child can’t, he or she may not be able to form healthy relationships with others, or even themselves.

2. Autonomy versus Shame and Doubt (experienced as a toddler): In this stage, a toddler tries to become independent from his or her caregiver. If parents don’t give the child boundaries and choices, he or she will feel shame and doubt (likely because he or she is so dependent on the caregiver).

3. Initiative versus Guilt (experienced from ages 3-6): A child plans and executes his or her own goals and sets his or her own boundaries (like deciding to cross a street on his or her own or riding a bike with or without a helmet). If he or she can’t reach the goals, the child acts out and eventually feels guilty for not being able to reach his or her goals.

4. Industry versus Inferiority (ages 7-12): Children in this stage want to learn and accomplish skills (writing, reading, etc.). They need to experience the feeling of success. If he or she experiences too little success, he or she will begin to feel incompetent or inferior.

5. Identity versus Role Confusion (experienced during adolescence): Adolescents must think about and determine who they are, and “where they are going in life.” If they are not allowed to explore, they may become confused about their role life.

6. Intimacy versus Isolation (ages 20-34): A person in this stage must be ready for intimate relationships and commitment, but must be able to balance intimacy and being alone. He or she must also be able to accept rejection. A person will experience either intimate relationships, or will be isolated.

7. Generativity versus Stagnation (35-60 years): A person in this stage is concerned with guiding the next generation. If this person feels that he or she hasn’t contributed to the next generation, that person will be self-absorbed and stagnant.

8. Integrity versus Despair (ages 60 and up): A person in this stage looks back at his or her life with pride and gladness, or looks back with sadness and unforgiveness of himself or others. They become dissatisfied with the lives they’ve led.

Socrates said that an unexamined life is not worth living, meaning that you have to think about why you act and feel the way you do. Erikson puts that quote into greater perspective.