Skip to main content

Comparison

Psychologists and others have studied ways in which we compare ourselves to each other. One man named Leon Festinger argued that we tend to compare ourselves to other people when we don’t know how good or bad we are at something (like football or playing the guitar).

One way we do this is when we compare ourselves to those who are not as good as we are, to protect our self-esteem (called “downward social comparison;” example: we’re playing basketball and miss most of our shots, but we feel okay because a teammate wasn’t even given the ball).
Another comparison we make is when we compare ourselves to others who are doing much better than we are (called “upward social comparison”). When we see others who appear to be doing better than we are, we can respond by trying to improve ourselves, or by trying to protect ourselves by telling ourselves it’s not that important.

There was a study published in 1953 by Solomon Asch, who asked students to take part in a “vision test.” The participants were seated in a classroom and asked to tell the experimenter to look at different lines on a card and tell him which line was longest, which were the same length, etc. What one of the students didn’t know was that the others in the room were part of the experiment and purposely gave the wrong answer, to see if the last person would also give the wrong answer. Asch found that a full 32% followed the others and gave an incorrect answer, even though it was obvious that this was the wrong answer (they said two lines were the same length, even though they differed in length by several inches). Even those who gave the correct answer appeared highly uncomfortable, because they were responding differently than the others.
(http://college.hmco.com/psychology/bernstein/psychology/6e/students/chapter_outlines/ch17.html)

It may be a good idea to compare yourselves to others to see if you need to improve at what you’re doing (like guitar). When it comes to your self-worth, however, it’s never a good thing to compare yourselves to others. Even when you feel good about yourself because you find you’re doing better than the other person, it can sometimes lead to pride.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Nice Guy Fallacy

I read part of a poem recently by one of my favorite poets. It reads: I envy not in any moods The captive void of noble rage The linnet born within the cage That never knew the summer woods. I envy not the beast that takes His license in the field of time Unfetter'd by the sense of crime To whom a conscience never wakes. Nor what may call itself as bles't The heart that never plighted troth But stagnates in the weeds of sloth Nor any want-begotten rest. I hold it true, whate'er befall I feel it, when I sorrow most 'Tis better to have loved and lost Than never to have loved at all. At base, Tennyson contrasted a life of risk, and consequent pain, with one of security. He sides conclusively with the life of risk, and says he fails to envy those who have faced no hardship. I agree with him; and, for good or ill, his words are just as relevant today as they were in the nineteenth century. Like then, there are those today who choose to live their lives with as little risk as...

Heroes

Although we have several examples of heroes in our day, one of the best known is of a woman named Agnes Gonxhe Bojaxhiu (“Gonja Bojaju”), who devoted her life to sustaining the “poor, sick, orphaned, and dying.” Her venue was Calcutta, India, where she served as a teacher until she began to take notice of the poverty there. Seeking to do something about it, she began an organization that consisted of just thirteen members at its inception. Called the “Missionaries of Charity,” the organization would eventually burgeon into well over 5,000 members worldwide, running approximately 600 missions, schools and shelters in 120 countries; and caring for the orphaned, blind, aged, disabled, and poor. As her personal work expanded, she traveled to countries like Lebanon, where she rescued 37 children from a hospital by pressing for peace between Israel and Palestine; to Ethiopia, where she traveled to help the hungry; to Chernobyl, Russia, to assist victims of the nuclear meltdown there; and to ...

Haiti 2012

In case anyone would like to help this trip, or would like to know what we will be doing, here is my support letter for our Haiti trip in June. February 11, 2012 Dear Friends, Family, and Fellow Believers: Last year, a group of eleven people traveled to an orphanage in southern Haiti called the Hands and Feet Project. During the week we were there, we witnessed poverty, disease, and overcrowding. We heard stories of abandoned children, natural disaster, and the uncertainties and isolation of missions work. We felt tangibly the confusion of a country wracked by hopelessness and overwhelming difficulty. In the midst of it all, however, we experienced something more. We witnessed the hope of future orphanages and clean water, heard stories of unity and compassion for children left behind, and felt tangibly the love of God for the people of Haiti through a group of unified people whose goal is to serve him. It was these experiences of hopefulness that left many of us change...