Again we continued our various projects today: painting, building, and installing. There has been a spectrum of feelings expressed by each of us as the week has progressed. Today has been an example of that. In part because of this, one of the most powerful lessons I'm learning on this trip is that it's okay to feel. I see my teammates breaking down into tears, showing anger, and expressing shame. Events like these are somewhat foreign to me. Seeing these moments of pain in others, though-- along with the healing that came through them-- shows me that there is real purpose in our feelings. This trip, in fact, has been as much about understanding ourselves as it has been about serving others through work and time with children. Many of us are seeing ourselves on a level we aren't willing to explore at home, and this in front of-- and perhaps because of-- each other. If I were to summarize this trip into one word, in fact, I would call this a trip of healing: we are healing each other as we help each other process our experiences and feelings; and we are healing ourselves as we allow our respective pasts to surface and as we face those pasts squarely. Listen to the prayers of our group members before we left and you will find a little more about our expectations for the trip: prayer to fulfill the roles we've been given, prayer for safety, and prayer for a willingness to serve. It is clear to me through them that we hardly expected a trip that would be as much about God's work in us as it would be about God's work through us. I suppose life can be so unpredictable, but God, it seems, can be more so. Here is a God who "works all things for the good of those who love him." These moments of vulnerability and feelings have been foreign, but they have also been deeply meaningful.
My social studies students and I are studying Islam right now. The other day, we were reading about one of the Five Pillars, zakat (charity in Islam that means "that which purifies"). Muslims believe that giving away money helps to purify it and also "safeguards [them] against miserliness" (1). I asked the class if this was true, that giving money away makes us less greedy. They generally agreed that it does. I wanted to test whether or not they really believed this, so I handed a volunteer a $10 bill. I told the class that I would ask for the bill back the next day. I said that they should pass the bill around among their classmates, and that as a result, there would be no way for me to know who had the bill. For that reason, whoever wanted to keep the money could keep it. Even if I did learn who kept it, I told them, I would not punish that person. I wanted them to be motivated by their own honesty. The next day, I asked for the bill, and a student handed it to me...
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